You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
