Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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