yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
smell my finger.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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