I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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