dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
