So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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