She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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