I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
