At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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