Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Everything about him screamed your future.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
