Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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