i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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