Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
