am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
