nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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