My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Two words: blizzard sex
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
