He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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