honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
