oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
