you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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