This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
