im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize
