Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
