We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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