My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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