North Korea, Best Korea!
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
