I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
