I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
