Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
