11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
