I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
