My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
