I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
