his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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