...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
