they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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