you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Randomize
