i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
