I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
