The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Green mimosas i think yes
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize