We won't sleep together?
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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