I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
