half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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