I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
