Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Just puked most of my soul out..
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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