I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
