just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize