isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
