you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
