you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
